My eyes became itchier and itchier as a familiar yet unwelcome feeling gradually encompassed my body from head to toe. “Nooooo. This can’t be happening to me! Not now. I don’t have time to be sick right now. This is not the right time!”
I was sitting in a high school cafeteria for my daughter’s chess tournament surrounded by 480 plus students, their parents, and some siblings. I changed purses that morning before rushing across the Houston highways and didn’t transfer my essential oils or much of anything for that matter. As the day went on my fears were confirmed and I realized I was coming down with the flu.
This was NOT good timing! My husband, who is very helpful with the girls and home stuff, was away and I had several deadlines and projects apart from the usual daily to do’s. I kept pushing forward in true Jess fashion until my body aches forced me into my bed while visions of “I should be doing this” danced in my head.
I decided to drive myself to the doctor when my fever persisted at 103 and the nurse two took long swabs and poked them deep into my nostrils. I passed the test with flying colors. It was positive for the flu.
I returned home, turned on oil diffusers, and began my usual immune-boosting regimen by doubling up on probiotics, taking colloidal silver, (mix of essential oils in a capsule) to aid in absorption, water, rest, vitamin C…the works. I also visited my chiropractor who graciously agreed to see me. They had the exam room door open so I could walk straight in without touching anything or making contact with anyone. It was quite comical. Dr. Dannenfelser adjusted me and applied an e-stem to break up the gunk in my chest and I returned home.
All the while I can feel my inbox filling with emails about deadlines for articles, homeschooling activities coming to an end along with party information, kid’s church program memos on rehearsals, other commitments, so on and so forth. “WHY do I take on so much?” I could feel that pesky little feeling of “overwhelm” invading my brain in the same fashion the flu had overtaken my body. I KNEW my immune system was down due to stress (both necessary and not), lack of sleep, and simply trying to cram too many things on top of being a wife, mom, homeschooler, and home manager into one day.
Upset at yet another failed attempt to reach Super Mom and Wonder Woman status, I began to cry as all of the emotions, coupled with my ailing body, were too much for me to bear. In that moment of weakness I was able to shut out all the external interruptions that constantly vie for my attention, time, and resources and focus on Me, Myself and I. Everything else faded into the background.
My husband returned three days into the flu battle and I quarantined myself upstairs with my oldest, who recently displayed visible signs of “coming down with something”. He took our other two girls to work with him to avoid the germ-infested dwelling as much as possible for the next three days. So now not only was I the patient but I had to be the nurse too and added a second round to my regime.
My daughter and I were back to a healthy state by the following week. Thankful for being a stay at home mom, having the help of my husband and friends who shuffled my girls back and forth and covered for me at children’s church, I sat down and wrote all the things that were eating up my time from my family and realized I needed to shift my priorities.
I decided to take time to just do nothing with my family. Doing nothing takes effort and planning when you are a “hundred miles an hour” on the go kind of gal! My bah humbug attitude shifted to “let’s TRY to make gingerbread cookies and pecan pies for the first time.” I wouldn’t have done this with my usual schedule. Don’t get me wrong. I LOVE Christmas time and traditions but lately with so much on my plate on top of homeschooling, writing, and blogging, I get overwhelmed and feel constantly rushed. This results in rushing my family through things and getting irritated with them. That’s not the mom and wife I want to be or how I want to be remembered.
I’ve decided to be intentional about making my husband and girls a priority and enjoy this season in my life. My girls are only little once and they will be young women in the blink of an eye. I want to be available for them as much as I can. I will continue to blog as I love sharing my experiences and helping other women, but it will be in a way that allows me to fulfill my responsibilities to my family first.
I’ve been blessed with a beautiful family and want to take time to soak it all in: the good, the bad, and the ugly! It’s not perfect and I still get frustrated but I’m fully present for the moments we make together.